January 19, 2011

Smut Marathon 9 Results

It was a pretty close race - I lost round 9 by two votes. On the one hand, I'm disappointed. I've really been enjoying this challenge, and was of course hoping to continue on. But on the other hand, I'm pretty pleased with myself. We started with 17 writers and I made it into the top five. That's nothing to sneeze at. I'm really proud that I made it that far, especially dealing with a personal setback that affected my motivation and inspiration.

As a result of participating in Smut Marathon, I've started doubting myself a little less. I'm always my own worst critic, but I made it into the top 5 of this contest; I'm good. Not the best. There's room for improvement. I still need to hone my skills. But when you get right down to it, I'm good.

Participating in this competition also reinforced the importance of writing even when you don't feel like it. Been dumped and don't feel like writing a frisky sex story? Too bad, you have a deadline. I wasn't about to drop out of the competition - not when I had already come so far. Having these contest deadlines every few weeks reinforced that, while you might need a break from time to time due to certain life circumstances, if you want to be a writer you can't let those bad experiences overwhelm you forever. You need to write despite all of that. You can't give up that essence of yourself for very long. Besides, having something to focus on other than the problems at hand is often quite helpful.

So while I'm a little bummed to be leaving, I'm proud of myself, and I'm very happy that I participated. Congrats to all the winners! I look forward to seeing how this contest ends.

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